Friday, April 06, 2007

"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." Anais Nin
(Artwork: Ball masque-'Sun')

This is a wonderful quote for this budding, blooming time of year, so it feels right that I found these words today. My studio is newly remodeled and still smells like fresh paint. I am working on 4-5 new pieces including the final sculpture in a 'Seasons' series entitled, 'Spring'. I have several new workshops starting this week, new blogger pals to chat with on the web, and a new book, "Ten Zen Seconds", to read by Eric Maisel with an interview to follow next month. So it seems many things around me in my world are blooming.

But what's sticking me up are the words...painful and risk. Scary. I don't know how to respond to that. What should I do? Should I do anything? If it's already happening, then, I can just sit back and enjoy. Right?

Then another quote found its way to me, "I am developing both my active and receptive energies," from Shakti Gawain's book, "Reflections in the Light". The daily reading for this April day explained the two ways to get what we want in life using masculine or feminine energy. The masculine energy is the go-get-it way. The feminine energy is the attracting-it way. One the bee, the other the flower, so to speak.

Raised in family of boys, I'm more familiar with the active, go-get-it energy. Allowing myself to be receptive and allowing what I want to happen or come to me, feels uncomfortable. It feels weak and lazy but also risky. What if nothing happens at all? Won't that be painful to admit that I did nothing? Ahh, those words again...painful and risky.

Does a bud push itself to blossom? No. But it does take in the nourishment it needs to grow, so in that way, it is active in the process of blooming. It is also, receptive. Waiting for the right temperatures and sunshine that will allow it to bloom. Just like the bee is needed to spread the pollen between the flowers, both masculine and feminine, active and receptive energies are needed to make things grow.

And so, I can be both a bee and a flower to myself. I can go-get-it. And I can attract-it, open up to receiving and allowing what I desire to bloom in its own time.

You know, taking that risk doesn't seem so painful, after all.

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